There’s no greater pain than heartbreaks and vomiting- I legit think they are feelings of near death experience.
I have had great moments filled with happiness and laughter. Moments I thought would be infinite. I have had days when all I need is to see your texts, hear your voice, feel your presence and embrace your touch and then everything gets better.
There are days when I know in a world of billions of people you are the only one that is dependable and reliable. The only one that will trade it all to make my dreams come true. The only one who truly cares.
There are times when I am upset, sad, angry and lost and all I need is your ears and you give it all to me- even though they are as tiny as they can be.
And then came the horrors of human interactions. We tried, we failed, we tried again and fail.
There’s a sort of peace knowing that I have had you. To know what I want and to know what my expectations are.
There are some sadness knowing that we are not meant to be.
But I find strength in the infinite moments. Hoping that they will be once again. And I calm my anxiety, knowing that everything is fated and what is meant to be will be.
In this moment all I can say is that I have loved and lost.
“Trust the wait. Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming, when nothing is certain, anything is possible” – Mandy Hale
There are so many people who had a vision and it came through. It does not necessarily mean that they did not experience any direct or indirect struggles but we see their wins and acknowledge their successes.
On the other hand, there are some of us that are stuck in a never-ending cycle of uncertainty and indecisiveness.
I am some of us.
But what I have learn is that once we are alive we will wake up and be anxious, depressed, happy, sad, nonchalant, indecisive, lethargic, productive and so on.
The point is life carries on whether or not we want it to. We have no authority to put a pause on life itself.
As such, I have employed a few strategies to help me make sense of my uncertainties:
- Everything that happened was meant to be;
- Anything that is meant for me, will never miss me;
- Take a deep breath when uncertainties seem to be overwhelming;
- Take a moment to be grateful for all the already achieved goals;
- Change my train of thought;
- Find new ways to solve current and pending issues;
- Things will work out if it is meant to be;
- With effort and dedication on my part careers, hobbies and social/intimate life will fall in place;
- Everything in life is temporary, nothing, including my struggles and uncertainties, lasts forever;
- Take a step back and recuperate.